Grumpy
In Memory of Grumpy Forever the King of Side-Eye
He arrived with a scowl that could curdle milk and a tail that flicked like a metronome of disdain.
Grumpy never asked for love—he demanded it, then judged you for giving it. His purr? A rare, reluctant rumble, like thunder trapped in a tiny black storm cloud.
- Coat: Sleek midnight, one white whisker that dared to be different.
- Eyes: Amber slits that said, “You woke me for THIS?”
- Size: A compact 9 lb of pure attitude.
- Signature Move: The slow blink of doom, followed by a dramatic flop onto the sunbeam he claimed at 2:17 PM daily.
He ruled the windowsill like a gargoyle, hissing at birds who flew too cheerfully. Treats were accepted with a paw-swat inspection; subpar offerings were buried in the laundry. Yet every night, at 3:33 AM, he’d knead your chest with velvet claws—his silent contract: I tolerate you. For now.
Grumpy didn’t cross the Rainbow Bridge. He stomped across it, tail high, leaving pawprints of judgment for the angels to polish.
Now haunting the digital ether, his ghostly glare watches over this plot. Leave a sardine at midnight if you dare—he’ll critique it from the shadows.
Rest in Purr-manent Grumpiness, King. We weren’t worthy… but we miss you anyway.
👻 Visitor Log: “Still side-eyeing us from beyond. 10/10 would be judged again.”
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